This is different than the real but normal daily problems of motherhood, so I’m leaving that space downer-free. C2 is really sick. He seems to have Necrotizing Enterocolitis. It all went south right after I left yesterday evening. I did skin to skin with him for a while and everything was pretty ok. After that he kept needing more and more respiratory support, ending in him being intubated and back on a ventilator, which they initially had trouble with because he was spitting up all the undigested milk in his stomach (about 3 hours’ worth of feeds). His belly was really distended and X-ray conformed the NEC, which they are repeating every 8 hours to watch for bowel perforations. So far no sign of that but peds surgery team is also following him closely. He got a (4th now) blood transfusion overnight and is getting plasma right now. There’s a lot more to it but basically his treatment is bowel rest (IV nutrition), tons of strong antibiotics, and supportive care. Still waiting for cultures to know if anything else is infected. He seems to be comfortable now, peeking at me occasionally. But he is still only 2lb5oz. I’m not doing well. Yesterday was already a shitty day, crying to my OB about my mental state. Now this, which may or may not have long term implications and probably definitely means he’ll be here long past when I have to go back to work.